Dating calling vs texting
A good first text will explain who you are and reference your previous interaction in some way.
That can make you over-think what you say and do on the date, instead of being your natural self.
While it's debatable whether grammar and spelling matters in texts overall, you're better off using proper English in your initial texts with someone you'd like to date.
Ansari and Dr Klinenberg said that bad grammar and spelling was considered a turn off in every interview they did with focus group participants.
You'll become "that cute girl from the gym" instead of "some girl that I guess I talked to other day?
" What you say in your first text message important (more on that later), but it isn't nearly as important as you actually reaching out. As online dating coach Patrick King explains, they have already given you their number because there is some mutual attraction there, so you don't have to stress as much about the possibility of rejection.
If you don't text them relatively soon (or sit around hoping for them to text you first), a couple things can happen: that cute guy at the gym will either forget about you and that he gave you his number at all, or he'll assume you're not actually interested.
Nerdlove recommends you text them in the same day or night to keep the emotional momentum going and to solidify yourself in their memory.
Since our whole world is so instant now, people can craft entire personas through their slew of texts. We asked Vanessa Marin, licensed marriage and family therapist and Lifehacker contributor, how to avoid the "secretary problem", and she said it's all about being specific: Make specific plans. The fewer direct questions you send their way, the fewer responses you have to stress about.
King suggests that texts dependent on responses will leave you feeling anxious and insecure. If a conversation starts, great; if not, don't stress it. If you *are* already talking, follow the flow of conversation.
Don't try to force it; if things taper off, let them.
When you do send that first text, however, Regina Lynn, the author of , suggests you follow the same etiquette as phone calls.
Don't text him at odd hours, like late at night or really early in the morning. This was by far the most common advice you'll find: don't just text someone "hey." In fact, if you browse some online dating profiles you'll probably find people sharing the same advice.